One of the people I was watching, someone I liked, has deactivated his account. It hurts, and I've begun missing him immediately. I regret not talking to him more. Even though I have no clue why his account has been deactivated, I can't help but feel like I should have done more and been a better friend to him. Yes, I'm saying I feel a bit responsible, even if I may not be. Silly, I know.
I wear my heart on my sleeve occasionally, and yet I'm still shy about contacting people. It has improved in the past five years but it could be better. I don't know why he left dA, but I miss him, and I wish I'd made sure I had other ways to keep in touch before he left. All I can do is hope I'll meet him again.
It doesn't help that I still miss Japan and my Japanese host family so much that I no longer like living in this country.
So, no matter how popular I may become or unknown I may remain now or in the future, I hereby swear that I'll never deactivate my account, even if I say goodbye entirely (that isn't likely, though, unless I die—and that won't happen anytime soon, hopefully >_>). I'll leave everything up here.
I'm not angry with him, I'm just depressed. It was enough to completely kill my mood.
To those who have remained on here (the ones I watch and who watch me), I say thanks. Even long absences are bearable if I can see your art or journals.
Frae.
